I feel so empty nowadays. Like theres nothing left inside of me, its just a facade I put on. The cheerfulness. I'm not exaggerating. Sometimes, I feel so rock bottom that I don't know what to do. Maybe its just a phase, a temporary abyss that I've fallen into and am tring to claw my way back up. Or it could be a supermassive black hole. Hmm.. I hate this feeling. Of feeling trapped.
I'm not being pretentious, I'm not saying this so I sound ... I don't know. I'm not doing this to grab attention. I just don't know how to describe how I feel. Sadness mixed with the feeling of being all alone. Yet I feel so indifferent and unemotional at the same time. Is this what depression feels like? I can't runaway from it. Fighting back? How?
Even in presence of company I feel that way. In fact, I can't even identify how I'm feeling right now.
The best part is when I'm asleep. I don't think, I don't even dream.
Labels: seriousness