You know that evil word... the one that makes you so stressed out? Where people break down and cry when it gets too much. That word, that thing, that makes us all flip out and aim to do our best and reach it even though the journey is so tough, exhausting and plain kills you.


EXPECTATIONS


I've never had so much on my hands. So heavy a burden on my shoulders. So many people's expectations to meet.


The debaters, the edboarders, the athletes and the latest addition, the yellow house members.

Not to mention my results.

There will be times when I will start breaking down in school. I will cry like I've never cried before. But those of you who see me, don't worry. Just comfort me and give me a little time, because I'll get right back up and meet your expectations and I will smile through it.

I will be all that I can be.




It will be a crazy, exhausting, chaotic year. There will be sweat, tears, maybe blood? But at the end of it, I'll come out a more matured, wiser, enriched, more DETERMINED person.


Well, not that kind of determination. :D

Labels: Philosophies, School, seriousness

I'm right back to square one with all these nonsensical thoughts zooming around my head.

I do wonder that back then, was it my personality that did it?

Have I changed, to change all that? Or, is it just because they didn't know me any better?

What was it actually?

I'm sorry, for the mask I've developed. Maybe I was a better person back then? Or just better at pretty enigma? Looking back, I do regret it and I'm sorry, but it probably meant nothing and means even less now. But, was it a mask back then? Am I who I really am right now?

If only someone knew what I was talking about. If only I knew how to express it without sounding psychotic(schizophrenic)?

But of course, I can't tell anyone. Or, they'd just think I'm some nonsensical bovine who thinks too much, expects too much and ends up with nothing. Thats probably true though.

I set my hopes and expectations too high, much too high for what I'm worth.

Ignore me though, my mask will be back on in a few minutes and you'd never know. (: Not that you ever did.

Labels: Philosophies

I just finished watching How To Lose Friends and Alienate People. It was alright. A little predictable but it really got me thinking. Sometimes, when you want to succeed does it mean you have to give up what you really want. When it comes down to it, which would you choose?

Success or Passion?

Plot summary :
Sidney Young is a disillusioned intellectual who both adores and despises the world of celebrity, fame and glamor. His alternative magazine, Post Modern Review, pokes fun at the media obsessed stars and bucks trends, and so when Young is offered a job at the diametrically opposed conservative New York based Sharps magazine its something of a shock! It seems Sharps editor Clayton Harding is amused by Young's disruption of a post-BAFTA party with a pig posing as Babe. Thus begins Sidney's descent into success - his gradual move from derided outsider to confidante of starlet Sophie Maes. Initially helping him out at Sharps is colleague Alison Olsen, who has her own secret. Wither their friendship?

Its easy to say that we would choose our passion for whatever-it-is over success, fame and money. But when it comes down to it, I realize the choice is really hard. Its so easy to get caught up with the material thing in the world. So I wonder, how would I face that choice when I go out. Maybe its working overtime and moving up the career ladder or my family; Maybe its giving up something I love for something that pays the bills.

I hope I make the right choice.

To quote Robert Frost
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.



Oh and, I think Megan Fox relies too much on her sex appeal. Its a little nauseating at times. Guys would probably love it though. Just a thought. (:

Labels: Philosophies, seriousness

My new name is,

HELEN OF TROY SHIA DANIELLE CULLEN EFRONATE BEOUFY CHACE MACHEDA!

you'll be reading about me in history books. (:

Labels: Philosophies, random

I've been thinking huh.

Every girl wants to be the girls in the movies. Its either, the really pretty, popular obviously sexy kind of girls. You know, the cheerleaders, queen bee, leader of her posse of other equally pretty but somehow fade into the background because she's there kind of girls. THe girl that gets the hottest guys in school. She's rich, totally fashionable and has a tendency towards delinquency.

Rachel McAdams in Mean Girls. Totally spot on right?


BUT, because that is so hard to achieve. Most girls would like to
think of themselves as different. Hence, the other image.

You want to be the girl-next-door thats actually DIFFERENT. You want to be that pretty girl that gets prettier when you take notice, beautiful without putting in any effort. You know, the brunette with captivating dark eyes and soft voice who's super quiet and brooding instead of the airy, buxom blonde with the b*tchy attitude. You want to be that girl who the camera always catches looking pensively off into the distance with her dark hair blowing in the wind, smiles a little (but the guy always tells you your smile is beautiful. The girl who gets the most gorgeous guy without having to do anything but sit there and amazingly manage to attract his attention by looking moody, fragile and usually snow white fair. Why? Because she's DIFFERENT.

Bella in Twilight. RIGHT? ADMIT IT.

Why do you think girls always try to recreate the worn out jeans and t shirt look with the sling bag and the converse sneakers in a fashionable way? To look lke the girl next door who is different somehow!

Am I right? Well, for the majority. Because I've always wanted to be the second one. Not in a vamp movie, but yeah, that image. Well, reading about Bella put things in perspective. and you know what? Not everyone can be like that. Hence, the title of the post- the images we want to project but so rarely succeed. I guess I do the same with my pictures. I might not look that good in real life, its just something I would like people to think of me. Its the angle, the lighting, and my pretty smile.

I've learned to accept me. Say what you want, sticks and stones won't break my bones. (just dont throw them at my foot. ;) )
I'll just be me, with my broad shoulders, muscular legs and pretty, pretty smile. The girl with the pretty pictures but not so pretty real self. (:


PDV. (:

Labels: Philosophies

I really hate online games. You know why? All the girls who have boyfs who are siao about dota, pokemon, cs, cod, whatever it will be will understand.

I want to talk to you. Seriously. You say later. But later doesn't happen.

Labels: babyjae, Philosophies, seriousness

Love is a strange and complex thing. There is friendship love, family love, relationship love, religious love and....



Bearing this in mind when I ventured to Delicious for lunch. It was a guilt free or (fat free?) trip as Delicious claims their well, deliciousss food to be....



This isn't fat...



Neither is this...



or this....



Get ready for the huge orgasmic delight...



Its not fattening. Even though its a DELICIOUS mix of chocolate brownie, chocolate sauce and chocolate ice-cream. It is made with LOVE.

Ah the joy and blessing of love. (:

Love is absolutely...



=)



Rachel certainly agreees. =]


 

Labels: Outings, Philosophies